Better not Bitter
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Welcome Back Sis…
Have you ever wondered what does bitterness look like? What does it feel like? Or maybe how can I choose to forgive?
Well we are so glad you stopped by because we know all to well…
Better not Bitter
Why do we pick the scabs off of our cuts, scraps, and bruises when we know that it's there to protect and help with the healing process?
Bitterness destroys our minds, souls, and bodies. John Ortberg Jr. wrote, "Bitterness is like drinking rat poison and waiting for the rat to die." Eventually, bitterness will kill us either physically - because it can contribute to physical sickness, or spiritually- by not allowing us to experience the peace God wants for us.
Most times we stay in hurt because we either haven't forgiven ourselves, so we keep rehashing/continuing to live in the hurt of the past, or we haven't forgiven the person who caused the pain, so we remain in a state of bitterness and regret.
Bitterness can take over us without warning. It is a subtle tool of the enemy that we won't see coming if we have filled our hearts with regrets and allowed our minds to stay in the broken unsettled places of our past.
Bitterness is not just a feeling, it can be acted out in our behavior and become poison to those around us. We unconsciously but actively spew it out in the biases of our ministries, our conversations, our interpretation and precautions of people's motives and intentions. We say hateful things, we mislead, we judge, we bicker, we fight. We must keep our mouths closed until healing is found.
Hebrew 12:15 14-17 tells us we need to work at getting along with each other and with God. Otherwise you’ll never get so much as a glimpse of God. Make sure no one gets left out of God’s generosity. Keep a sharp eye out for weeds of bitter discontent. A thistle or two gone to seed can ruin a whole garden in no time. Watch out for the Esau syndrome: trading away God’s lifelong gift in order to satisfy a short-term appetite. You well know how Esau later regretted that impulsive act and wanted God’s blessing—but by then it was too late.
Bitterness can also hide behind facades of boundaries or self-protection. We often put personal boundaries, guidelines, rules or limits in place to create safe and permissible ways for other people to behave towards us and us them. We use boundaries to hold people accountable for all the times we felt used and mistreated.
Bitterness is a multilayered emotion that has been described as a mixture of disappointment, disgust, anger, and fear. Psychologists consider it a mood or as a secondary emotion that can be elicited in the face of insult and/or injury.
Bitterness is a tricky little devil, it hides behind smiles, congratulations, promotion parties and ministry events.
Here are some signs to help you identify bitter roots that may be forming in your life or the life of a loved one.
You have imaginary conversations in your mind with someone who wronged you.
You feel the need to slander someone to other people.
You replay a conversation or experience over and over in your mind.
You're happy when someone else fails.
You feel anger every time you hear a particular person's name.
You don't behave naturally around a person.
and You complain often.
Staying in this state feeds the plan of the enemy and blocks us from seeing and experiencing the compassionate and healing grace of the cross.
His grace is gentle and non-assuming, but nevertheless, strong enough to completely erase hurt, bitterness, misunderstanding, regret and the plan of the enemy for your life.
We have to pray against bitterness, asking God to forgive those who have hurt us and to heal us from the situations that aim to put a bitter taste in our hearts, in our life....in our purpose. Remember: from the heart flows the issues of life (prov 4:23).
Giving our heart to God means a new life, a new purpose, a new sense of self. It means washing our earthly worries and regrets away, day by day, and trusting in Him to heal us. (John10:10)
Don't let bitterness settle where joy should be residing.
Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Romans 12:12
When you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive them, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you of your sins. "Lo, for my own welfare I had great bitterness; It is You who has kept my soul from the pit of nothingness, for You have cast all my sins behind Your back. Isaiah 38:17
Prayer
Dear Heavenly Father we thank You so much that You said in Your word You have come to give us life abundantly. Help us to claim this promise so that life won't get the best of us but we will experience the best of life, in You.
We release our hearts to once again hope and ask that You give us Your Joy in place of all the bitterness we have been harboring!
Thank you so much for your patience and compassion towards us, Amen.
I do declare and decree that the cycle of self-inflicted pain, cherished hurt, endured strife, bitterness and misunderstanding will no longer be the practice of our life!
Written by Catherine Harris
Follow her on IG at @faithfullycat